I, Sinhosa

I like to daydream.

Of all my recurrent fantasies, the most football-friendly one is one in which I was born fabulously talented, physically perfect, and Brazilian. I'd have grown up in the favelas of Rio, nurtured at Santos, and spotted by Wenger in the U-19 World Cup. I'd have the feet of Robinho, the explosive power of a young Ronaldo, the teeth of Ronaldinho and the bushy-browed bride of Kaka. Trust me, she's hot.

Career-wise, I'd be extremely well-paid by Arsenal. I'd play in the hole and play cute one-twos with Cesc, Nasri and Eduardo. I'd score twenty goals a season, provide the crucial assist in the Premiership winning match at Old Trafford, and score a hat-trick in the Champions League final. And in the off-season, I'd take great pleasure in telling Real Madrid's network of dodgy agents to "shove it" into a number of unsociable places.

My nickname would be Sinhosa.

It's from a site I stumbled across a few months ago on the Guadrian website. I linked it on the right as Brazil Name, but it does more than that. If you type in your name, you'll get a little Brazil shirt featuring your nickname and the No.10. And you can print it out.

I did that just now, and as a result, I've got a little cut-out "Sinhosa" shirt. I also had a spare passport photo lying around, which I've cut out and attached to the neck. I look quite nice in a Brazil shirt. I'm thinking of getting it laminated. Or blown up and made into wallpaper. It's something to think about on a cold Sunday afternoon.

In other news, Almunia thinks that Theo should become a bastard.

"The only thing Theo maybe has to improve is his character; he's a lovely guy on the pitch - I keep saying to him he has to become more nasty. After this he will be one of the best players in the Premier League."

I hope he doesn't follow that advice. He's such a nice boy.

In other, other news, I've joined a site called Soccer Fan Forums. It's quite wide-eyed and earnest, with none of the cynicism and loathing normally associated with my blog. I find it a quite refreshing read, especially after twenty-odd minutes of whiny, introspective blogmaking. Check it out.