Jay-Z wants to invest in the Arsenal

I'm not a businessman,

I'm a Business, Man

Let me handle my business, damn

- Jay-Z, a potential investor in Arsenal FC

What does it say about me that I get excited about the idea of Jay-Z becoming an investor in Arsenal FC and having a seat on the board? Am I so besotted by celebrity culture? Are my thoughts so superficial that I think Jay-Z’s genius as a rapper and his talent as a successful Business will automatically translate to the Byzantine world of football politics?

I hope not, but I’m not sure.

I don’t get excited about the prospect of having a fat Uzbek oligarch with alleged criminal links on the board. I don’t get excited about having a skinny American with pretensions of a global sporting empire on the board. I don’t get excited about Danny Fsizman, Peter-Hill Wood, Sir Chips Cheswick or anyone else on the board. I did get excited about foxy Nina Bracewell-Smith on the board, but she’s been kicked off. However, I am genuinely excited by the idea of Jay-Z at the Arsenal.

Here’s what Jay-Z said about it:

"(Wife Beyonce and I) would have to spend much more time in London. Bey knows how much I love sports and has known about my interest in Arsenal for a while. I never want to be a back-seat investor. I want to be on the board, involved in the decision-making... I'm at the stage of my career where I am ready for another investment like this. I have really got into soccer over the last 10 years and I've been saying for some time I want a percentage of Arsenal.”

Actually, I think Jay-Z would fit well with the Arsenal board, if he ever got on it. It’s a bit cynical of me, but I think that at his heart, Jay-Z’s a businessman. He buys and sells. He likes to make a profit. And in the Arsenal, he’s come across probably the only football club in the world which makes money and which has the ability to expand. It’s a good business opportunity.

And the moment, the Arsenal board are only interested in coasting along and making a profit. It’s been paralysed for the past five years with in-fighting. The old members are just marking time and waiting for the market to pick up again before they can dump their shares. Usmanov and Kroenke don’t have the funds to buy the Arsenal outright, but don’t want to give up their 30%. So we’ve got a board that’s content with the status quo, paying down the loan and earning a tidy profit every year.

It’s a good match-up.

Jay-Z's a gooner

"I'm glad Arsenal now know it's them I support. It would be good to chat with Cesc and some of the other guys over lunch. The next time I'm playing in England I would like the Arsenal playesr to come and watch my gig and then come backstage afterwards."

- Jay-Z, as gushy as a kid in a No.4 shirt

Apparently, Jay-Z supports Arsenal and his favourite player is Cesc Fabregas. He has a wish to meet the Arsenal players one day, and organise a time when they can come backstage with him one time when he does a gig in England. I find it quite remarkable that a guy like Jay-Z, who has everything the world can give, can come off sounding like a fan-boy when talking about the Arsenal.

It clarifies a few things, though. I always wondered why Adebayor was so pissed-off and regretful about leaving the Arsenal. It couldn't be because of the money. It couldn't be because of the trophies. And it couldn't be because of missing the opportunity to head-butt a team-mate on the pitch - with Craig Bellamy on the team, they're bound to start fighting one day.

I think Adebayor's regretful because he's going to miss the opportunity to meet Beyonce. If Jay-Z wants to meet the team, they would've met her one day. Didn't he once compare the chance to play for Barca or Milan to the chance of dating Beyonce? At the Arsenal, he would have had an opportunity to meet her, and maybe even impress her with the reflected glory of the Arsenal. But now at Man City? Fat chance. No one thinks playing for Man City is impressive.

I wonder how Jay-Z would react if an Arsenal Adebayor was to chat up Beyonce? I wonder if he'd be chuffed like a fan-boy that Adebayor was chatting up his wife?